Balancing summer teaching with research

Here at PermaU (a primarily undergraduate institution), it is very hard to get any substantial research done during the academic year. My undergraduate researchers typically worked four hours a week when regular classes were in session. You can imagine (or perhaps know first-hand) how little can get accomplished in 4 hours.... by an undergrad.

Thus, the summers are the only time I can really move projects forward. If I want to have enough done before tenure, I have no choice but to work in the summer.

This summer I had two undergraduates working for 12 weeks. My summer class started in the last half of their research time. Was I able to balance two undergraduate researchers with my teaching responsibilities? Short answer: sort of.

It wouldn't seem that much different than the academic year, right? After all, I have undergraduate researchers in the fall/spring and even MORE classes to teach. In reality, the demands from both category are much higher in the summer. My research group does much more involved protocols. I also am working with underclassmen, so they have to be taught everything. The summer permits the time needed to learn (and repeat) lab techniques, dive into the literature, and really learn how to keep a notebook. (oh, the notebooks.)

My class also requires a lot more out of me. Typically I have off days in between lecture days. In the summer, I give two to three hours of lecture every day. The students are, in general, weaker as well. A majority of them are repeating the class after failing or withdrawing. Many of them hold summer jobs to pay for the class. All are burned out after the first summer class. Far more pep talks are required.

The key to maintaining my sanity-- and ensuring that we ALL had a productive summer-- was keeping lots of lists. I have a dry erase board in my lab, so each morning before class, I would meet with my researchers in the lab and together we would all map out the day's goals. Then I would help them list the steps to accomplish the various tasks. Sometimes this would require gory detail. Other days, I let them figure it out on their own. (Note that I couldn't let them do this every time, due to a few restraints we had from grant deadlines or the nature of the research.)

While I was in class, my students worked in the lab. They would go to lunch before I got out of class, so that left me a few moments to myself-- no class or lab students. I would meet with my lab group after they returned from lab to go over what they got accomplished in the morning. By the time the meeting was done, it was time for me to return to my summer class for the laboratory portion. After that finished, I met with my undergrad researchers again.

Rinse, repeat.

Frequent communication was the most important thing for me to keep my research going. What do you do--with undergrads or grads-- to make sure that the research ball keeps rolling?

Friday Fill in the blanks: making students cry

The surest way to make a student cry is to __________________________.

(While there are 1000s of ways, I'm sure, to cause a student to shed tears, in my experience, the fastest way is to say "it's okay; don't cry!")

The happiest I've been all summer

I think it says a lot about my current state of life that the following (all of which have happened in the last two months) did NOT make me the happiest I've been all summer:

• Getting a co-authored paper of previous work submitted
• Having Undergrad get through summer research with only three (very mild!) burns
• Making it through a (short) semester with no criers
• Receiving my first (teeny-tiny) grant
• Watching a movie with N.A. cell phone free

Want to know what really made this shallow assistant prof happy?

It's time to make it work! Tim Gunn is back on tonight! Love him. Want him. Must have him come live in my closet.

Can I get worker's comp for that?

This morning, I was really dragging. One cup of coffee: nothing. Two cups: barely able to pry my eyes apart.

Apparently, I was still about three cups behind by the time the mail arrived.

It's Whore Out Your Textbook Season, so I'm getting desk copies, supplementary DVDs, and online access codes by the truck load.

Today's WOYTS haul did not disappoint. There were several shiny boxes and envelopes just begging to be opened. Trouble was, one especially thick mailer envelope was just not opening. As I slid my finger under the flap and tried to wiggle it open, I watched as the cardboard cut deep-- and then deeper-- into my finger.

Did you know how many times you use your pointer finger each day? I do!!

I work hard at this job, but I certainly don't want to bleed for it.

Are scientists romantic?

The other day, I was talking with a friend (yes, an academic one, although a non-scientist) about relationships.

My friend complained that her husband wasn't romantic anymore, one year into their marriage. I commented that I wasn't a terribly romantic person, so I couldn't really expect N.A. to be romantic.

"Well, of course you're not romantic!" She laughed.

I arched an eyebrow in question.

"You can't be romantic-- you're a scientist!!"

Oh. Glad we straightened that one out.

True, my idea of a romantic gesture is for N.A. to turn off his blackberry so we can watch a movie vibration-free.

But surely some true romantics--who happen to be of the scientific persuasion-- are out there?

Right?

How can a secretary make my life better?

No doubt secretaries could rule the world. I'm sure many of you save hours a week thanks to your departmental administrative assistant. I just haven't figured out how to do that yet.

This last week, we finally hired a competent secretary. She comes from another department on campus, so I already know her reputation.


Now the big question is this: can I give up a little control and have the secretary improve MY efficiency?

What do I need at work? Here's a short list to start: a grant writer, a dog walker, a grader, and a priest.

Can a secretary actually help me with any of that? If not, I'm not sure I'm interested.

Begging, borrowing, and stealing in the name of research (at a PUI)

Starting a research lab at a PUI can be a challenging experience. Startup funds can be minimal, and sometimes you don't get them right away due to budget issues. (ahem) The consumables that you completely take for granted in grad school, such as acetone, pipet tips, centrifuge tubes, etc., become a Really. Big. Deal.

So this is what the first half of 2010 was all about: how can I beg, borrow, or steal various lab necessities in order to minimize the blow to my start-up funds.

Did you hear the one about the kid who traded up a cell phone for a porsche? Imagine if we did that in lab! I can see it now. I give my undergrad a Fischer click pen. Undergrad trades it for a TLC plate. The TLC plate gets traded for an NMR tube, which in turn gets bartered for a wash bottle. Eventually Undergrad makes it to a 1-mL eppendorf pipet. What to trade for next?

The possibilities are endless, especially given the random contents of most of my colleague's labs.

What a great way to solve my budget issues! Trade all the useless crap from professors long gone for stuff I need.

scientiae-carnival

Should you be friends with coworkers?

My mother is adamant that one should keep the work and personal spheres separate.

But what if you don't really have a personal sphere?

N.A. and I, both being academics, spend our non-home time at school. Some coworkers I click with, and some I don't. Some of my coworkers and I hang out outside of work. They come over for dinner. We go grab a drink.

The problem is, we inevitably start talking about work-- the good, the bad, and the really ugly. I want to have friends, but it is exhausting constantly talking about school.

I love my job. I may BE the job.

But for the love of the science gods.... I need a break sometimes!

Friday Fill in the blanks: the administration is a zoo!

If my dean were an animal, s/he would be a ____________ because ________________.

Go.

Feel free to pick your "favorite" administrator for this Friday fill in the blank.

Traveling more efficiently

The Reaction family knows how to travel. Every summer, we would do a massive road trip. I was >10 hours away from the Reaction family for both undergrad and grad school. I always chose to drive home for Christmas because I couldn't afford the airfare.

Let's just say, I have a higher than average tolerance for car travel.

Still.

I don't find travel by car very efficient. Take, for example, a 15 h drive. If I'm driving, I'm stressed mostly the whole time. I can talk on the phone in some states, but otherwise I just have music or conversation with my passenger to keep me entertained. If I'm the passenger, all I have is music, conversation with the driver, or sleep. I can't read in cars. Even looking at maps for more than 30 seconds results in major carsickness. Ick.

Now, let's consider the same 15 h distance covered by plane instead. True, going through security can be a little hectic. But otherwise, I find airports to be mostly pleasant these days. I can read, play on da internets, or watch people freak out when they miss their connections. I usually end up spending 2 hours at the airport. Add to that the travel time on either end of the trip plus the flying time (about 2.5 hours), and I still come out ahead by a couple of hours.

Nowadays, my rule of thumb is if a driveable destination is more than 10 hours, it is better for me to fly. N.A., however, happily drives 15+ or more hours rather than fly.

How do you decide whether to drive or fly? And more importantly, how do you convince a travel partner that your way is the right way?

Optimizing the office

My current office has a desk, table with chairs, desk chair, filing cabinet, and some built-in bookshelves. The only thing I like about it is that the door can shut properly and lock.

My ideal office would have the following:

• giant window
• couch that is inaccessible to students
• no bugs / mold / or general unpleasantness
• ability for my dog to come hang out
• fancy espresso maker
• big pile o' chocolate
• personal grant writer
• mini-fridge
• zip line to my lab
• wardrobe ('cause hiding jackets and boots is GOOD)
• sink
• escape slide
• direct line to the dean
• mute button

• (How did I forget this??!!) A bar! Fully stocked with my necessary poisons: some red stripe, chardonnay, vodka, OJ, and tequila

What are must-haves for your work space? Feel free to dream big. (I mean, really...I asked for no bugs or mold, and we all know that isn't going to happen any time soon.)

How to cleanse the department

I'm watching this crazy real estate show (Selling New York), and currently a hired dude is going around with burning sage to "clean" an apartment before a sale. Clean as in, chase out spirits and shit.


Hmmm... some departments--not mine, of course-- have bad vibes, too.

I don't think burning sage will work. I wonder what would be best?


Sudsy Alconox? A good burn-off of ethanol? Some nose-singeing mercaptos? What about a more pleasant approach with some nice esters?

Why is this happening to me?

Because today I dropped beats that cracked my cranium.

Unplugging to preserve my sanity

Geekmommyprof recently posted about the question that seems to plague all academics on vacation: to unplug or not to unplug?

I come from a very, very long line of workaholics. Some were famous in their academic circles. Some weren't. And some went bonkers (literally!) from their need to constantly work.

I attended a very rigorous liberal arts college for undergrad. As a student body, we worked extremely hard Sunday through Friday morning... and then binge drank Friday and Saturday nights. This is in stark contrast to my PermaU students. They only go out on the days that end in y. At my undergrad, virtually no one went out during the week. It's still a toss-up as to what I was closest: Cuervo or Kant? Vodka or Voltaire? Scotch or Smith? (Just kidding. I hate scotch.)

In graduate school, I was in a brand new research group. Being in the first crop of grad students of The Boss meant lots of one-on-one interaction (whether we wanted it or not). It also meant a lot of pressure to obtain grants. We submitted seven R01-type grants (and dozens of smaller grants) while I was in the group. In addition to getting preliminary results in the lab, graduate students were responsible for making grant figures, writing portions of the text, navigating the grants and contracts office, and making the FedEx runs. I can count on my hands the number of times Monday-Friday I was home before 7. And I left the house by 7 am. During the typical week, I worked 7 days and averaged 70-80 hours per week. During grant times, I never worked less than 14 hours straight. One memorable submission required two weeks straight of 16+ hour days. No food breaks--- meals were delivered or fetched by an undergrad.

Looking back, I am proud/shocked/sad that I pushed through it all.

Fresh out of grad school, as a visiting ass., I still did not know how to reign in my workaholic tendencies. I worked straight through weekends. During the week, I was on campus by 8 am and rarely left before 10 pm. I told myself I worked hard because I had to. Really, deep down, I knew I worked so hard because I wanted to. I felt compelled to pull such insane hours.

Then I moved and got on the tenure track. I got a Puppy. I was reunited with N.A. I knew that in order to maintain a long-term relationship AND keep up with Puppy, I would need to approach my work time in a very different manner. I could no longer pull such insane hours.

More importantly, I recognized that I didn't have to pull such insane hours. By being smarter about my work allocations during the week, I could tend to the house, the Puppy, and my life on the weekends.

So I self-imposed a no-campus policy on weekends. That is, I do not go into campus Sat/Sun. No matter what.

Being at a PUI allows me to do this. Also, my research is not such that I have to check on reactions each day. And my students can certainly survive with just email contact from me. The world will not end if I only work Monday through Friday.


At least that's what I'll keep telling myself until the senior members of the department notify me otherwise.

Where's the best comments?

I'm not thrilled with my current comment setup. I find it difficult to respond to comments. I'd like comment nesting, at the very least. Can I do that with blogger's comments?

One commenting system (?) that I've come across is IntenseDebate, but I don't have any real experience with it.

Any recommendations?

Why flighttracker was my best friend in grad school

Professor in Training recently posted about how the mice react at the prospect of the cat going away.

I was in the first group of graduates of The Boss. The Boss was very hands-on (which was great at times, annoying at others, and occasionally prevented me from getting ANYTHING productive done).

When other PIs left town, their graduate students breathed a sigh of relief. Work hours were more relaxed. Group meetings weren't held. Kegs appeared in the cold room (that was only a one-time event, I'm told).

In our group, it was a HUUUUUUGE relief when The Boss went out of town.... at least while the plane was in the air. Once electronic devices could go back on, the barrage of email requests began. Is the manuscript draft ready? Make this figure for my talk. What is wrong with you?

Since the only time The Boss unplugged (and therefore left us alone) was when a flight was in progress, we all became fans of flight tracking programs. Other graduate students thought we were total freaks (true) for knowing the flight details of The Boss, let alone would track the actual flight for precise landing times.... but we relished our freedom. Flight delays were celebrated....with impromptu happy hours. We savored our beers all the more with the knowledge that we weren't missing emails or calls from The Boss.

A few months ago I received the saddest email from a former group member who is still in graduate school with The Boss:

Hi Unbalanced,

The Boss has wi-fi on the flight. Our safe time is no more.

~Coworker



On the plus side, now coworker won't need to panic when the flight tracker fails.

If I hear the bing! from one more text....

...I am going to shove this pipet into my eye socket. After removing my safety glasses, of course.

All day long I have the "opportunity" to hear the distinct trilling of cell phones when a text is received. Students receive them during lab. I hear them going off in other classrooms. Even my colleagues are in on the texting action-- I can hear one faculty's phone from 8 doors down!

My research students learned by the second text to keep their phone away while in lab. Unfortunately, I can't run around, grabbing cell phones out of hands and pockets. That would be weird. And assault, probably.



Why do people need to be notified of text messages all damn day? And why are the notification sounds so annoying? When did email stop being instant enough?

Who's afraid of the dark?

Yes, I am a grown woman. With a Ph.D. And I'm afraid of the dark.

I'm afraid of things that go bump in the night. Plus, Puppy Freaks! Out! when the power goes out.

Which it did. Tonight. With N.A. out of town.



To remedy this, I lit all the candles in the house.

Unfortunately, they all are scented. The power is back on, but my house smells like lemongrass-pineapple mango-fresh grass-sand&sun*.

Yum.



*For the record, N.A. bought the sand and sun candle. For reals.

summer teaching: requesting time off

Turns out I was right about summer teaching: it is awesome!

I get to experience a semester's worth of inspiring successes, tearful moments, and, my personal favorite, eye-roll-worthy requests all in a very condensed period of time.

One such eye roll moment occurred today.


Undergrad: Yo, Dr. Reaction.

Me: . . .

Undergrad: I need to go on vacation next week. I'm going to miss a test and three labs.

Me: That's true.

Undergrad: So how can you work with me to get this work made up?

Me: What the hell is wrong with you?*


*Okay, so my actual response was to remind him of the course policy, which is clearly outlined in the syllabus of course, of not excusing personal travel. And that missing a week of summer class was equivalent to about three weeks of the normal semester. And that Undergrad would receive zeros for the missed work.


Undergrad: Oh. That sucks.


Yes, my dear Undergrad, that does suck.

Is it fair to meet outside of scheduled class times?

For the first time this fall, I'm co-teaching a course. Recently, the other prof and I met to sketch out our course objectives. We both agreed that we wanted students to present results from a group project, and we settled on the optimal week to schedule them.

I typed the presentations into the class lecture schedule.

"Wait, what are you doing?" She inquired. "We should schedule them in the evening so we have enough time."

"Okay," I agreed. "So will we meet for about two hours then? Which two class meetings should we cancel to balance it out?"

My colleague stared at me like I had just announced that I was the new Dean.

Siiiiiiiigh.

I explained that I didn't like holding class meetings outside of the scheduled class time....UNLESS I cancel an equal amount of class time. I don't think it is fair to require students to meet both in class and at a set time outside of what the registrar has designated.

Obviously the coursework requires that they spend many, many hours outside of lecture reading, writing, and 'rithmatic-ing. But to take away that study time-- which could be used on another class-- is not fair to the student or to other professors.

I'm pretty sure my fellow prof thinks I just don't want to have to stay on campus beyond work hours (true). But I've taught at institutions that actually had this policy on their books. Of course, many faculty ignored the rule-- as so often happens-- but I think, in this case, it actually is a pretty logical practice to follow.

Bathroom bacon

Today the women's bathroom smelled like bacon.

What the pork?

I know that you probably won't believe me, but I actually don't like bacon. I don't care for the flavor. The smell makes me feel ill (and not just because it reminds me of LargeU undergrads).

I suppose the bathroom could smell worse... but hopefully tomorrow's potty visits will be swine free.

Can men and women be friends?

You've Got Mail was on TV last night. The first time I saw it, I thought it was a little fluffy but still had a really cute story about the relationship that developed between Meg Ryan's and Tom Hanks' characters.

Last night, I viewed it a little differently. I couldn't even get through it for more than 10 minutes because the premise now left an icky feeling in my stomach. I saw the cute relationship that developed over email for what is actually was: two already-attached people having an emotional affair. Then, after their relationships with their respective partners end, they get together.

Some people say that men and women truly can't be friends.

I'm not really sure what to think. All I know is that I won't be watching chick flicks for awhile.

Another reason my puppy is better than a kid

Today I gave Puppy a new toy in honor of his birthday. It is a stuffed, squeaky piece of cake. Quite fitting, I think.

He gets so excited when something new is presented to him. He totes it around proudly, high stepping around the couch. After he has shown it off, he takes his new prize back to his room. And plays. Quietly. By himself.

This evening he behaved quite like a four year old, I think. Puppy was walking around with his cake toy when suddenly, something caught his eye.

A cardboard box. Ooooo....a discarded cardboard box! Puppy gave me The Look. I gave him the okay and he was off! He tested it with his paw first. Then he tore into it with a vengeance.

Now I'm catching up on some reading as he destroys the box. Sure, I'll have to pick up all the pieces later, but it's a hell of a lot easier than chasing after a three-year-old.

Let's clean another dirty mouth

You know those Orbit gum commercials? The ones with the tag line, "Orbit cleans another dirty mouth"? Like this one:

Wouldn't it be great if we could do that to our students?

Now, I'm no fucking angel when it comes to my language.

But I certainly don't scream out expletives every five seconds in lab. I save 'em for something that actually warrants the foul language. Like fire.

When I was in college, I would have been mortified if my prof caught me dropping an F bomb.

Dare I ask what's different about this generation?

An open letter to the Precious Little Snowflake

Dear PLS,

Why do you sing in the lab and hallway? Normally, I would ask if you need more attention.

But you are a Precious, Little Snowflake....so surely that cannot be the case.

Signed,

Dr. Reaction

P.S. Shaddup! Thanks.

What the Hel....vetica??!!!

Yeah, so my PC doesn't have the font Helvetica.

Is it all PCs? Or does Bill Gates just have it out for me?

And perhaps the better question is the following:

how the heck did it take me a year to notice this?

Are you a saver?

I am an introvert. I love my job, but after giving and giving all day in the classroom, at meetings, or in lab interactions, I need time at home to recharge, regroup, and basically become (semi)human again.

In order to be a semi-decent person in my home life, I have to save a bit of myself. I try to save my "best self" for my time at home, but I'm not always successful.

I'm not sure what extroverts do. Are they only recharging around other people? What is their home life like? Are they able to recharge with their significant others, or are extroverts miserable until they are reunited with a bigger group?

Do you save your best for your home life or do you use it all up at work?

Happy freakin' 4th!

May the science gods bless America.

Sarah, of course, blesses you all.

Rude awakening

This morning I changed up my usual schedule. Boy, did I come to regret that decision.

Most mornings, I go right from bed to the shower. Then I pry open my eyes wide enough to make some coffee.

Today, for some unknown (stupid?) reason, I skipped the shower and coffee and started putting away dishes. Barely awake, I opened the storage drawer below the oven. Forgetting one tiny detail: N.A. placed a mouse trap there last night. And it was occupied.

I've never moved so quickly in the morning. Stereotypically, I screamed like a, well, like a girl and ran back to the bedroom to cower next to N.A.

Thankfully, he didn't make fun of me. He calmly went to the drawer, removed the trap and mouse, and (he later told me), mopped up the brains, blood, and mouse pee. Gotta love him.

Meanwhile, if you could please excuse me because I think I'm going to go swoon on the couch now.

Happy Canada Day!

I hope all you Canucks out there had a great one!