My friend complained that her husband wasn't romantic anymore, one year into their marriage. I commented that I wasn't a terribly romantic person, so I couldn't really expect N.A. to be romantic.
"Well, of course you're not romantic!" She laughed.
I arched an eyebrow in question.
"You can't be romantic-- you're a scientist!!"
Oh. Glad we straightened that one out.
True, my idea of a romantic gesture is for N.A. to turn off his blackberry so we can watch a movie vibration-free.
But surely some true romantics--who happen to be of the scientific persuasion-- are out there?
Right?
8 comments:
There's plenty of nerdy romance between my spouse and I. Though some of it may include jokes about love being nothing more than a pleasurable neural state.
Does that count?
"Romance" is a misogynist fucken corporate scam. What makes a love relationship work is kindness and respect.
I knew that CPP was a true romantic! Totally agree.
I am not sure what falls under romance really. I don't care for grand gestures and presents (I also have no holiday spirit whatsoever), I have a pretty low tolerance for kitsch, and am grossed out by romantic heartfelt monologues. So I suppose that qualifies me as not romantic? Maybe just not cheesy.
Romance for my husband and me includes him making delicious cappuccino for us on the weekends, we sip it in peace while the littlest one sleeps; we occasionally go on lunch dates; we see a movie or a TV series together after the kids are sleeping. In lieu of gifts, we give each other a chance to sleep in on the weekends or take a nap. We are pretty affectionate with each other, so I am quite content in the romance department, even though there are no flowers or fine dining in the picture.
ehh... I think I might be too romantic for a scientist or even just a person. But true to form, I'm probably kind of practical. Although, I think practicality can be romantic.
and of course, being honest and loving.
small notes are never wrong either... or love poems... yeah, I'm the sucker who writes them most of the times ;)
what I really wanted to say though was "isn't romance when you want to make the other person happy on their terms"? turning the bb off is showing someone cares... and that might be way more romantic than those "every kiss begins with K" coorperate "knowledge/notion" of "what romance is"....
Your friend thinks that every day of decades of marriage is going to be like the first few months of courtship? There is some reality to the "Seven Year Itch", but the "One Year Bailout" is more common for just that reason. Reminds me of the couple that got divorced so they could be comfortable living with each other without the subtext of Ozzie and Harriet expectations they associated with "marriage". What CPP so eloquently pointed out.
Your idea of romance (doing something the other person needs without being asked) is closer to what has kept our marriage solid for several decades than giving flowers, although a well-timed gift basket of chocolate never hurt. (N.A, are you listening?)
completely practical at work and totally a romantic sucker elsewhere....but i did marry an artist!
Are you kidding me? Am I an outlier in this too? I’ve known I wanted to be a scientist since I was this high, and I’m also an incurable romantic. Romance, when done right, is far from cheesy or kitschy. Of course, my SO is a writer, so I get first-rate poetry! I fully expect this behavior to continue after we’re married – I’m going to put it in our pre-nup. ;-)
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