2008 in Review

As seen over at What a recently tenured college professor shouldn't be doing... (which has one of the best urls ever...check it out!)

Addy did this with the year 2006, but since UR didn't exist then, I'm going to use this year. I think it's pretty neat!


Rules: take first sentence of first post of each month.

January 2008: People find my site through a wide range of google terms (some on google and some on google blogsearch). (The month I tried to find any activity that would distract me from looming job interviews.)

February 2008: Yeah, that's me. (Hmmm...this could be referring to so many things.)

March 2008: I absolutely do not believe in love at first sight. (At this point, N.A. and I were already in love. I never would have thought I'd find someone like him, if you had asked me this time last year.)

April 2008: Well, N.A. and I made it through our first trip. (And we're still going strong!)

May 2008: In my department there is an unwritten code of conduct among graduate students. (I'm much happier now that I'm in a relatively politics-free department. Switching to a new school in the fall-- I hope!-- is going to be a big adjustment.)

June 2008: Yesterday, at a thesis defense, I had difficulty seeing the whole screen. (Oh.....how many strange faculty members there are at LargeU. Now I'm in a department with colleagues that are (mostly) quirk free.)

July 2008: Now you know I'm not one to criticize others' child-rearing skills (ha, ha), but I feel like the following warrants (at least a little) judgement: (Worst places to encounter ill-behaved rugrats: planes, trains, and churches.)

August 2008: ...well, at least for this moment. (Hmmm...)

September 2008: I hate hate hated group work when I was a student. (And I still do, although I use it in almost every lecture.)

October 2008: Last week, I gave my students their first exam. (They liked that one. Not so much on the later exams.)

November 2008: I've been gone all week at my first conference as a (semi) Real Professor. (I'm completely comfortable with the Dr title now. I still bristle whenever someone calls me "Mrs" or "Ms." I'm not sure that will go away, at least when I'm in the classroom.)

December 2008: Driving a huge, gas-guzzling SUV with expensive, tricked out snow tires is super safe. (I. Hate. SUVs in the winder.)



Hope you are all having a wonderful, alcohol-drenched start to 2009!

Movie Mania Meme

As seen at juniorprof and junction potential (go check 'em out!)...and probably loads others of you as well. I tag all of you that want to play, just comment so that we can all click over to see your totals. Also, if you have any links to other fun / semifun / time wasting memes, please comment below. The semester is only a few weeks away, so I need to start compiling a list of procrastination possibilities.


I'm not really that much into movies. (My netflix account is almost exclusively used for TV shows.) I haven't seen many of the "classic" ones (define that as you will), so this should be interesting.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
( ) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
( ) Neverending Story
( ) Blazing Saddles
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
( ) Joe Dirt
( ) KING KONG
Total so far: 6

( ) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
( ) Halloween
(x) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving -MAS
( ) Flubber (orignal only)
Total so far: 8

( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
( ) Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam
( ) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 11

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
( ) Gothika
( ) Nightmare on Elm Street
( ) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 15

( ) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremacy
( ) Lone Star
( ) Bedazzled (original only)
(x) Predator I
( ) Predator II
( ) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
Total so far: 21

(x) Independence Day
( ) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(x) ET
(x) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
( ) Rush Hour
( ) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 25

( ) Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
(x) Calendar Girls
(x) Sideways
(x) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
( ) The Terminator
( ) The Terminator 2
( ) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 32

( ) X-Men
( ) X2
( ) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
( ) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
( ) Freaky Friday (original only)
( ) Reign of Fire
( ) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
(x) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 39 (I think?)

(x) Swimfan
( ) Miracle on 34th street
(x) Old School
(x) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Kippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old-virgin
Total so far: 44

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring (I will say it: THIS IS SUCH A BORING MOVIE! Pretty, yes.)
( ) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
( ) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total so far: 48

( ) Baseketball
( ) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
(x) Elf
( ) Highlander
( ) Mothman Prophecies
(X) American History (Is this American History X??)
( ) Three
Total so Far: 50

( ) The Jacket
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
( ) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
Total so far: 53

( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
( ) Hulk
( ) Dawn of the Dead
(x) Hook
( ) Chronicle Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
( ) 28 days later
(x) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld
Total so far: 55

( ) Kill Bill vol 1
( ) Kill Bill vol 2
( ) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
( ) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
Total so far: 56

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
( ) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back [I agree with Dante, this is the best]
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total so far: 61

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
( ) The Matrix Revolutions
( ) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
(x) Team America: World Police
( ) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal
Total so far: 65

( ) Battle Royale
( ) Battle Royale 2
( ) Brazil
(x) Contact
( ) Cube
( ) Dr. Strangelove
( ) Enlightenment Guaranteed
(x) Four Rooms
(x) Memento
(x) Pi
( ) Requiem for a Dream
(x) Pulp Fiction
(x) Reservoir Dogs
(x) Run Lola Run
( ) Russian Ark
( ) Serenity
( ) Sin City
( ) Snatch
( ) Spider
(x) The Sixth Sense
( ) The Village
( ) Waking Life
( ) Zatoichi
( ) Ikiru
( ) The Seven Samurai
( ) Brick
( ) Akira
Total so far: 73

Hmmm...seems that I have a lot of movie watching to do!

A note to parents everywhere

If you are going to buy your kid a Nintendo DS / iPhone / weird techie game thing I've never seen before, then please buy them the matching headphones. I don't need to spend my bonus time at the airport (read: flight delayed 2.5 hours...and counting) listening to their game plink, boing, or clang.

Thank you.


(although with this delay, there should be no chance of my bags being delayed, right? For those of you keeping count at home, I was reunited with my bags 4 days, 23 hours, and 8 minutes after the baggage carousel stopped turning.)

Should I stay or should I go?

Historically, my big life decisions have not required me to select from just one of two choices; I have not met many proverbial forks in the road... more like sporks. For example, when I decided to go to graduate school, I knew I had the option of many disciplines. I also knew that I could easily change my mind at any point and leave. If LargeU ended up not being a good fit, I could (with minimal pain), pull up roots and switch to another program or school.

Likewise, when I decided to accept the Visiting Ass faculty position at TempColleg, I knew that I wasn't risking much: visiting positions are becoming more and more common (woohoo! Teaching postdoc, anyone?), so I wasn't worried about the job becoming a black mark on my CV. If I hated it, it was only nine months. If I liked it, bonus points.

So in recent months, I've been exploring new territory. I had to decide whether to go back on the active job market or continue on for another year at TempCollege. I chose to not put out any applications. The Boss was terribly disappointed that I was closing the door on all potential opportunities. The argument was made that I could leverage any tenure-track offers to try to gain a position at N.A.'s institution.

Now, a door has opened at N.A.'s institution. Would I still have this option if I had put out applications in September? No. In November? Maybe, but it would have been very interesting when it came time to do interviews.

So I guess in my case, it appear that by closing the door to other tenure-track possibilities, I have opened a (teeny, tiny) door to a potential position that would put me in the same city as N.A. Stay tuned for updates on my two-body situation!

scientiae-carnival

100 Things I've Done

I first saw this over at The Happy Scientist, and I've since seen it all over the blogosphere.

1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars We camped... a *lot* as a family.
3. Played in a band Marching counts, right?
4. Visited Hawaii Probably one day, although neither N.A. nor I are particularly beach-oriented people.
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity It was a little touchy in grad school, but I always stayed in the black.
7. Been to Disneyland/world Went with band. I was not impressed.
8. Climbed a mountain Just some really tall hills. Oh, I did a 2000 ft hike in Central America....does that count?
9. Held a praying mantis Whywhywhywhywhy?
10. Sung a solo I have a *terrible* voice. No one would want me to do that.
11. Bungee jumped Again....whywhywhywhywhy?
12. Visited Paris Looooooved it!
13. Watched lightning at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch I'm not really that artsy.
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning Mmmm.... projectile vomiting...good times.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty Can you even walk to the top anymore?
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train I found the back-and-forth motion quite soothing!
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked Ummmmm.....no!
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill Muhahahaha.... actually, I haven't done that since high school!
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb I'm not really down with barn animals.
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse I don't think I've lived anywhere where a total solar eclipse has been viewable in my lifetime...I've seen partial ones....I remember making a viewing box back in school!
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset I usually miss sunset, and actually more frequently see the sunrise. So sad.
31. Hit a home run I was the kid that caused all the parents to groan when I came up to bat. Yes, I sucked THAT much at softball.
32. Been on a cruise While an Alaskan cruise is tempting, I think I've seen too many 20/20 episodes with blacklights to truly relax and enjoy a cruise.
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language (another thing I've daydreamed doing.)
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied I think that is where I am now. Being truly satisfied means that I'm paying all my bills and still socking away money for the down payment for the house.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David Is that in Florence? I would loooove to go there!
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted What do I look like, a princess?
48. Gone deep sea fishing I only caught a tiny one. It was sad.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China Not *yet*
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving Whywhywhywhywhy?
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check oops!
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy It's a pillow. I'll save that store for another post.
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar Salty!
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone Just a toe!
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book Binding my thesis was a truly awesome experience!
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car Hahahahahahaha! No.
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous I'm counting famous scientists (hahahaha!)
92. Joined a book club HAHAHAHA....should we all count journal club???
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee Turns out, I'm quite allergic!
100. Ridden an elephant (at the zoo)

Couple (Christmas) compatibility

There are many questions that one needs to ask a significant other before making the Big Commitment. We all know the standard ones:

- Does s/he want kids?

- How does s/he handle finances?

- Does s/he have The Herp? (while that might not be a dealbreaker for some...um...more dedicated types, it is certainly a relationship ender for me)

- Can I tolerate (at least in small doses) the in-laws?


But perhaps the most important test of compatibility this time of year is the following:

REAL or ARTIFICIAL?


I'm talking about the tree.

Some people truly don't care what their Christmas tree is. (In my experience, they are usually either Jehovah's Witnesses or Jews) But I find that many, many people feel very strongly about which type of Christmas tree should be displayed.

Personally, I think it is really wasteful to keep a real tree for (maybe) three weeks, just to toss it out. The smell makes me sneeze, and I have an irrational fear of it catching on fire.

Looking back on previous relationships, I can remember how insistent that each were that one day we would have a live Christmas tree. I should have cut my losses then and there and dumped the losers. If you can't agree (or at least compromise) on what kind of tree to purchase, the relationship is doomed to fail. Why doesn't Oprah ever talk about the all-important Christmas tree compatibility test??



(and for those of you wondering.... yes, N.A. is a steadfast supporter of artificial trees).

New look for Christmas?

I am home, but my bags (containing shoes, interview clothes, textbooks, and presents) are not. I have all the important stuff with me like my stash of chocolate, medications, laptop power cord, cell phone. As of now, my mother has provided me with a toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, razor, sleeping shirt, sweatshirt, hairbrush, face wash, and moisturizer. She has offered socks and interview clothes. We both draw the line at underwear.

Unfortunately, our shoe sizes are quite different. If my bags don't arrive today, I'm going to be rocking the snow boots look at Christmas mass. My interview isn't until January, so I won't have to wear them to an interview....but I think that would really make me stand out, don't you think?



ETA (at 10:30 pm): Still no bags. According to the airline, one bag is completely missing still, and the other is "in transit." So tough to decide: wait it out, or brave the mall tomorrow??

What *really* matters in student evaluations

I take course evaluations very seriously. I try not to let the bad comments get me down. If they are the outliers, then I know that it's just one slighted student (likely one not happy with their D), and that I should take it all with a grain of salt.

Likewise, ratemyprofessor.com has to be taken with a HUGE grain of salt. (Oh come on. You know you've looked yourself up on there!). RMP.com is widely used at plenty of schools, but it's not such a hit at others. The latter is the case for TempCollege. The reviews that do make it on there are from either very pissed off or very happy students. In my department, there are several profs that have no reviews at all... despite being here for more than four years.

In light of this, I know I'll have to be sure not to take any reviews too seriously.

Besides, we all want one thing from ratemyprofessor.com.


Don't deny it. You know you want it: a hot pepper!


(A hot pepper is given when a student feels that the professor is hot....or when they want to joke about their "hotness". We'll just stick with the first explanation.)


So all I really want for Christmas (now that my grading is done!!!) is a hot pepper. (and not that it's a competition or anything, but time will tell if I get a hot pepper before N.A.!!)

Teaching timeout

I've been very bad.

I've been catching up on literature, pursuing new research ideas, and working on syllabi for the spring.


This should be fantastic. Look at me, getting ahead!


I should be grading. I've got three sets of exams to mark and grades to compute.

Nanny911 puts kids in timeout for every minute of their age. I'm taking that parenting rule of thumb and multiplying it by the number of exams I have to grade. At this rate, I might not be done until after Boxing Day!

A conversation with my mother

My mother: Do you think you'll be done with work before you come home?

Me: Mom. We have this conversation every year.

(It's true. Each year, she asks the same question. Each year, I give the same answer: my holiday vacation time is 5 days, of which at least three days will be at least partially devoted to work.)

My mother: I know. But I reeeeeally want you to be done with work before you come home. Do you think you can get done? Please?

Me: (sighing) Yeah, I think all the grading will be done. I'll have do a bit of reading, but nothing major.

My mother: Oh, yay!!! You can do it! You can get your work done!

Me: Aw, Mom. That's really great!

My mother: Yeah, you can do it! Then, since we both don't have work, we can drink! Yay! We can get-- what do you call it?--drunky-drunk!*



I love my mom!


*I don't call it that.

What the world needs now...

is not more "love, sweet love."

What the world needs now is a Final Exam Question Generator.

Dirty little secret

My secret behavior that I wouldn't want my coworkers to know? I'm a closet bridal registry lurker. When acquaintances of mine get engaged (Facebook is a gold mine for such news), I click on over to theknot.com and look up their registries. And then I judge them. (By "them" I mean both the selections themselves and the happy couple for making such ridiculous selections.)

Brown towels? Bleah.

Only 200-count sheets? Why even bother?

Do newlyweds really need a creme brulee torch?

Does the average couple need a $1200 set of pots and pans?

What the hell is a butter warmer?


I just don't get it.

Why is it that wedding gifts are now viewed as an opportunity to upgrade?

Starting to feel like a "real" grown-up

I've already written on the surrealness of being called "Dr". Although I felt pretty darn grown up when I was first called Dr. Reaction (and not just in jest by The Boss or Coworker), I've topped that "omigod, I'm an adult" moment.

I'm making my first payment on my college loans this month. Now that is a true "I'm an adult" moment! (a feeling I can enjoy every month until 2016 apparently!)




When was your first real "crap, I'm a grown-up" moment? Defense? First house? First pet?

baby (buggy!) steps

Today my biggest accomplishment was getting a very large, hairy insect off my 12 ft ceiling.*


Is it the end of the semester yet?






*I finally got the little bugger (hahaha!) to crawl onto a broom. I then squealed like a little girl as I ran it out of my apartment to the front porch. For all you bug lovers out there: I then let it go free. For all the rest of you: I squished the hell out of it. It was the only humane thing to do; it would have died in the 20 degree weather.

Another reason to hate SUVs

Driving a huge, gas-guzzling SUV with expensive, tricked out snow tires is super safe.

Safe for the freakin' SUV driver! Are they even aware that their fancy-pants tires are displacing all that snow and sleet into my freakin' lane and windshield? Yeah, they have enough traction to go 70 when the rest of us are navigating the wintry roads at 35 mph...but what if one of us accidently swerves into their lane thanks to being temporarily blinded when an SUV zips by.

If I thought my tiny, environmentally friendly compact would even make a dent into their bumper, I'd ram it into them.


I used to be consoled by how much it cost to fill the gas tank on one of those monstrosities. "Ha, ha! Suck my 35 mph gas mileage," I shouted at their shiny exteriors, knowing that their luxurious interiors buffered them from my proclamations. But now, with gas prices tumbling (although not here in TempCollege Village--WHY??), I can't even cling to that. I guess I'm stuck sucking their slush.