Dangling the carrot: research with undergrads

Practically a lifetime ago, I posted about undergrads needing incentives to complete coursework.

I've found that the same is true for my researchers. Sure, some undergrads will be motivated to research just for the sake of doing the research. But, in my experience, most of my undergrads need an additional incentive for their lab work.

In grad school, The Boss would dangle the promise of a C/N/S paper in the hopes that that would motivate me. (It didn't. The best motivation was getting a graduation date. Duh.)

For some of my undergrads, the promise of coauthorships really excites them. I have another who is really motivated by the potential for travel to conferences. My newest student wants to accomplish a lot on his research project so he can be competitive for top graduate programs.

(And I should note that while The Boss made-- it turns out-- empty promises, I know that I will, DAMMIT, get some papers out, take my students out of state, and get them into the best grad programs. Dammit.)

What's the most effective carrot for YOUR researchers (undergrads, grads, or post docs)?

Why flighttracker was my best friend in grad school

Professor in Training recently posted about how the mice react at the prospect of the cat going away.

I was in the first group of graduates of The Boss. The Boss was very hands-on (which was great at times, annoying at others, and occasionally prevented me from getting ANYTHING productive done).

When other PIs left town, their graduate students breathed a sigh of relief. Work hours were more relaxed. Group meetings weren't held. Kegs appeared in the cold room (that was only a one-time event, I'm told).

In our group, it was a HUUUUUUGE relief when The Boss went out of town.... at least while the plane was in the air. Once electronic devices could go back on, the barrage of email requests began. Is the manuscript draft ready? Make this figure for my talk. What is wrong with you?

Since the only time The Boss unplugged (and therefore left us alone) was when a flight was in progress, we all became fans of flight tracking programs. Other graduate students thought we were total freaks (true) for knowing the flight details of The Boss, let alone would track the actual flight for precise landing times.... but we relished our freedom. Flight delays were celebrated....with impromptu happy hours. We savored our beers all the more with the knowledge that we weren't missing emails or calls from The Boss.

A few months ago I received the saddest email from a former group member who is still in graduate school with The Boss:

Hi Unbalanced,

The Boss has wi-fi on the flight. Our safe time is no more.

~Coworker



On the plus side, now coworker won't need to panic when the flight tracker fails.

Blogger, interrupted

My recent absence from the blogosphere is due to a wicked combo of graduation festivities and a much needed vacation abroad. I'll be back to the States next week.

Posts to look out for:

* Key observations of and reactions to all that is the PhD graduation

* Interactions with The Boss post-doctoring

* Thoughts on why I am pro-drugging children (note I did not say infants) on trans-Atlantic flights


Hope all is well with you! I look forward to catching up on your blogs once I'm back home to my steady internet, scattered sleep, and semi-crappy food!

Conversation with The Boss

Unbalanaced Reaction: Here you go, The Boss! {hands over package}

The Boss: {looks confused} Uh, what is it?

UR: Your academic regalia for graduation! I went to the departmental office to pick it up for you!

The Boss: Uh...oh, it is time for that already?

UR: {patiently} The Boss, you know that you need that for all the post-graduation photos of all of us with you. You know, while we're all going to be in our gowns and hoods.

{pause}

UR: You'll want these pictures some day. I want them some day. My mother wants them now. There will be lots of pictures.

The Boss: {winces}

UR: Yeah, that's the face you need to get out of your system before graduation. My mother will only make you take more pictures if you look like that.



The Boss thinks that *I'm* a handful? Just wait until The Boss meets my mother during graduation weekend!!

Exhausted.

Preparing for my upcoming job interviews (four in the next two weeks) has been surprisingly draining. Luckily, I'm surrounded by incredibly supportive people, including The Boss, Coworker, Coworker Friend...and even some new friends.

The sheer amount of time it has taken me to prepare my various teaching presentations, re-research the schools, and finalize my travel arrangements has shocked me. I happen to be at a relatively quiet time in my research (for the first time in, like, oh...five years), so everything has worked out without any major catastrophes or ulcers.

But it got me thinking. If I'm this stressed out applying as a graduate student to SLACs* then how the heck would I have dealt with applications to R1 schools as a postdoc, with less downtime and more responsibilities? No wonder postdoc positions seem to be running longer and longer!





*SLAC=small liberal arts college

It's going to be a long four months...

Today The Boss wanted to meet with each of us individually in order to set goals for 2008.

The Boss started off our meeting by declaring: "Unbalanced, I think it's time for you to start thinking about picking a defense date, maybe April or May."

Now in 2007, I would have been so happy to hear The Boss say that. My response? "Are you fucking kidding me?" (The Boss and I are very free in our language. It's bad, I know.)

The Boss blinked at me in confusion, so I decided to play along.

"Okay, The Boss, I think April would be great."

The Boss: Great! I agree!

U.R.: How about April 24 at 3 pm?

The Boss: Okay! Wait, did we already do this?

U.R.: Yes, The Boss, yes we did.

The Boss: Shit.



Sigh. It's going to be a long year.

Cutting the cord

Over the years, I have taken far less than my month's worth of vacation time, partly because I'm a slightly neurotic, workaholic and partly because The Boss is reluctant to grant time off.

Over the last six months or so, I've had to go through a cutting of the cord process with The Boss. This entailed working "I'm graduating and leaving in May" into conversation at least once a week. When The Boss acknowledged this statement with rolled eyes or "I think Decemeber 08 will be a better exit date," I had to increase the frequency to nearly daily discussions about my graduation. After about two weeks of this, I finally got through.

The Boss never looked back.

The Boss has cut the cord, but now it's practically like getting kicked to the curb! I'm over-exaggerating (a bit), but let me point you to the latest incident:

I need to travel home on two different occasions this spring for two separate, two-day events. I requested 2.5 days off for each trip. The response from The Boss? "I think you should take more than 3 days." I didn't think anything of it (actually, I thought, "wow, that's nice!") until I looked at the group vacation calendar. There were 5 days and 6 days marked off for the trips! Way to get rid of me.

If The Boss is going to be so lenient about taking time off, perhaps I should just take advantage and plan a real vacation!

We're having a baby...named Tenure

On a recent weekend, I ran into some fellow grad students heading into the building as I was heading out to watch football. They (semi) jokingly chided me for leaving work so early on a Saturday (in our department at LargeU, the average work week is ~65 h/week, but in my particular area it's usually more like 75, getting in the upper 80s during grant time).

I (semi) jokingly replied, "No one in my group has to work weekends anymore, now that we have tenure."

"'We?' So you all get tenure once The Boss does?" They grinned at what they though was my misspoken pronoun.

"Well, yeah, actually. We all got The Boss tenure. So we are all tenured now!"


And don't you think that's only fair? We all stressed, pushed, and bled for The Boss to get the publications out in time for the tenure packet review (culminating in 12 papers submitted in 3 weeks, thank-you-very-much!). I bribed students in a class of The Boss with pixie stix and put in extra office hours to ensure high teaching marks. We all endured three submission rounds of The Biggest Grant ever, requiring 14+ hour days (for two weeks straight) to get data analyzed and figures made in time.

So yes, just like men often say "we're having a baby," I'm going to proudly proclaim, "WE just got tenure."


Unfortunately, I don't think that's something I can list on my CV, huh?

Cheating the system (?)

Early in September, I submitted a short paper, a communication, really. This particular journal typically returns reviews on such communications very quickly, on the order of ~3 weeks.

After 6 weeks, The (newly tenured) Boss sent the editor a brief email inquiring about the status of my manuscript. A week later, we received a response.

Not an apology.

Not my reviews.

No, instead, the email stated that my communication had been accepted as is, and the galley proofs would be arriving in 5-7 days. The reviews weren't part of the email, and they weren't located in the online system, either.

While I should be very happy not to have to do any revisions, I can't help but wonder: is this really peer review?