UR 2011 in Review!!

Another year in the books.  It's time for my favorite meme!   (If you are looking for something to do, here is 2010, 2009, and 2008.)



1. UR 2010 in Review!!!  What a year!


2. Choose your own adventure.  Have you ever woken up from recalling a vivid dream and then had it stick with you ALL. DAY. LONG?


3. What will we lock up next?  Today, driving around Conference City, I saw a car with a padlocked gas tank.


4. The machine or instrument that must DIE!  Over the years, I have had many an instrument or machine nemesis.


5. Kids vs. dogs (or kid owners vs. dog owners).  It occurred to me the other day that I have never seen a puppy sonogram posted as a facebook profile picture.


6. Chicken vs. eggs.  I've been in a documentary state of mind.


7. Magic numbers.  People say that three's a crowd, it takes two to tango, and one is the loneliest number.


8.  At-bat songs for professors.  Unfortunately, I've been watching a lot of baseball lately.


9. A message to all the new professors.  It gets better.


10. Sorry that I don't have kids.  I've recently become quite the broken record.


11. Grants require blood, sweat, and tears....and more blood?  No, really.


12. Do faculty need more vacation time?  When you are a professor at a PUI, you are constantly giving giving giving of yourself to your students.






I hope you can all look back on your OWN 2011 and think of it fondly.  What a year!

Why it is awesome being female (at a conference)

As you all probably have guessed by now, I'm woefully behind in my blog reading.

Luckily, I did manage to catch a semi-recent post by The Prodigal Academic about why it is awesome to be a female attending male-dominated conferences.

TPA points out that there are no bathroom lines when you are one of a handful of women at a conference.  So true!  In fact, at a recent conference, another conference attendee (a rock star Big Name) was so surprised to have someone else walk into the bathroom (me), that we actually struck up a conversation....which led to talking about my research with my students.  Awesome.

The second advantage that TPA lists is that, as a minority presenter, you are more easily remembered later in the day.

The third deals with presenting while pregnant.  You can read it for yourself, since it doesn't pertain to me (whew).

The fourth is my favorite because it happens to be true AND I had never really thought about it before:

4. You are easier to find in the crowd, so it is easier to run into old friends and colleagues at coffee breaks without necessarily prearranging things.  (link)

And TPA's fifth advantage to attending a male-dominated conference?  Well, let's just say it deals with getting free stuff.


So what about it?  Are there more advantages that should be added to The Prodigal Academic's list?  Or do the wee annoyances (you know, like being asked eight times in one afternoon if you REALLY are a presenter and not a vendor representative) outweigh these benefits?

UR 2010 in Review!!

What a year!  (If you are really bored, here is 2009 and 2008.)



January:  Credit goes to all over the freakin' blogosphere, such as here and here and here.  (From "2009 Year in Review")


February: There is perhaps nothing more entertaining to students than a professor teaching under the influence of lots of cold medication. (From "Teaching under the influence?")


March: The hiring process is not fun on either side. (From "Googling candidates")


April: Last year, as many of you know, I was a visiting ass. at a small college. (From "Visiting Vixens")


May: I'm pretty low maintenance. (From "Taming the Talons")


June: Yes, prior to class so they/I can write on them.  (From "Should powerpoints be available to students?")


July: I hope all you Canucks out there had a great one! (From "Happy Canada Day!")


August: The Prodigal Academic has a great post up about the current state of the job market. (From "dying for your work?")


September: The reason I blog is _________________. (From "Friday fill in the blanks: why do you blog?")


October: The highlight of my week was _____________. (From "Friday fill in the blanks: the high point of the week")


November: The dumbest thing I saw this week was ______________ . (From "Friday fill in the blanks: that's pretty dumb")


December: This past weekend, something happened for the first time since October. (From "At clothing capacity?")




Was 2010 memorable?

My winter break gift to you

I know you have been curious.  "Whatever will UR give us this year?" You wondered.

Here it is, my friends.  My 2010 gift to you: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/ 


I laugh so hard I cry.  I hope you do the same.

Pondering a move

I said back in June that I wasn't going to go on the job market.

While N.A. and I didn't officially go to market, we came awfully close. Like, close enough that I had a cover letter drafted. Close enough that we had calculated how much money we would likely lose on the house.

Close enough for me to get excited about the possibilities.

I've had a lot of blog topics bouncing around in my head, but I haven't had the opportunity to give any time to formulize them. No energy.

Now that I'm past the great Job Scare of 2010, I should be more of a presence around here. Stay tuned for posts on such topics as academic accommodations, cheating (again. sigh.), workload, crappity crap, research with undergrads, and boobs. Yes, boobs.

Friday Fill in the blanks: why do you blog?

The reason I blog is _________________.

The reason I blog is for the fame and popularity, clearly.*

*This post is in reference to a post up over at Dr. Girlfriend's place. In the side bar, you can vote for why YOU blog. Among the choices include "sharing your experience," "venting," and, my personal favorite, "fame and popularity." Please click on over to vote!

Where's the best comments?

I'm not thrilled with my current comment setup. I find it difficult to respond to comments. I'd like comment nesting, at the very least. Can I do that with blogger's comments?

One commenting system (?) that I've come across is IntenseDebate, but I don't have any real experience with it.

Any recommendations?

Good eats?

PermaU students complain All. The. Time. about the cafeteria food.

My college cafeteria had terrible food. Like, unrecognizable gruel-type food. So I'm not the most sympathetic when my students complain about PermaU's cafeteria fares.

But even my food experiences don't compare to that of Mrs. Q, blogger of all that is elementary/middle school lunch eats. Enjoy this except of one of her "favorite" entrees, pizza:

The cheese looks shellacked and shiny. And the "pepperoni" is in little squares.

"Shellacked" pizza? Me thinks my undergrads should stop complaining about their under-stocked salad bar or "only" six choices of soda pop.

Help a Grad Student Out

It's time to help a fellow blogger out! Many of you know EthidiumBromide over at Disgruntled Julie: A Ph.D. in Progress. She's a rock star. Rock stars deserve awesome things. She has asked for our help in getting her an awesome camera bag, so please click on this link and vote for her (#95).

Please go vote! Ends today at noon CST.

2009 Year in Review

Credit goes to all over the freakin' blogosphere, such as here and here and here. I've seen this at too many of your homes to count, so if you've done this meme (or some variation) please make some noise below. And happy 2010! (2008 was pretty exciting, too.)


Let's recap the year with the first sentence from the first post of each month.

January: This week a student made an appointment to talk about last semester's final exam. (From "Thank you; may I please have another?")

February: The other night I had my most Miranda moment to date. (From "Death by chocolate")

March: Who needs spring break more: undergrads or faculty members? (From "A question for the masses: gimme a break")

April: My DVR is 97% full. (From "How busy am I?")

May: Dear googlers, When you google "how to cheat with calculators" or for other cheating tips (like How To Fool That Bitch Professor), the post of mine that comes up is this one. (From "How students cheat: a youtube sampling")

June: My fridge/freezer/cupboards contain the following foodstuffs: (From "feeding frenzy")

July: Lots of firsts this weekend! (From "weekend of firsts")

August: My mother has had the same microwave since 1984. (From "How much would you pay for a microwave?")

September: Well, my darlings, I got it. (From "Flu policies")

October: I know that I'm an amazing professor. (From the not-so-modest "Boosting the ego")

November: As the semester winds down, it's a good time to reflect back on the last months. (From "Finally getting some")

December: I'm not sure students here at PermaU really understand that once they have a Judicial Committee ruling against them (cheaters! cheaters!), some professors will never view them in the same light again. (From "Judging the judged")

My warm, fuzzy Christmas present to you

(just pretend that it is wrapped with fantastic, non-tacky holiday paper)

My gift to you is a link to this post over at Twice about a conversation with daughter, Curie. The best line? "Mommy, can boys be scientists? Or just girls?"


It made me all warm and fuzzy, like a steaming mug of hot chocolate (or spiked coffee).

Post-semester priorities

The semester is over. OV-AH!!!



Some people are excited about catching up on sleep. Others are glad not to have to deal with students for a few weeks. For some, the end of the semester means time for family.


And me?


I'm most excited about getting caught up on my blog reading and posting.



What does that say about me and my life priorities?

So it's come to this...

...it's time.

I really didn't want this day to come, but I know it is necessary to maintain my mental health.


It's time to turn on word verification for my blog comments.


Spam in other languages I can ignore (and eventually delete). After all, if the only words in English are "sex", Viagra, or "hot girlz", then I know it really doesn't apply to me.

Spam in English is more annoying because I certainly don't want any of you, dear readers, to accidently click on a link and get a virus.


I've hesitated to turn on word verification because I really dislike it. The extra step is mildly annoying, but what really gets me are the "words" themselves. I *always* misread the word. Usually into something perverted. Every time. Without fail.


Am I the only word verification pervert out there, or is this just one more thing I should add to my list of Weird Things that Annoy Unreaction but No One Else ?

How to get an ulcer

While I don't actually have an ulcer, I am sure I'm well on my way. In addition to a whole pile o' unbloggable nastiness, here are some of the reasons I've been M.I.B (missing in bloggin') lately:

- class prep is totally kicking my ass

- a student had a mental breakdown in my class

- N.A. and I adopted a dog

- Said adopted dog thinks she is not house-trained and has a penchant for biting my toes.... and waking us up at 5 am. Every. Day.

- Did I mention all the unbloggable nastiness?

- N.A. and I bought a house


Hope to catch up with you all soon....

Quickie

My brain is mush, but don't worry ('cause I'm sure you were, right?); additional posts about my Visiting Ass. position are coming soon.

In the meantime, click on over to Dr. Pion's and check out the latest job-related post. Definitely has some good linkage in there.

Wow! So Wonderful! So Amazing!

I'm a big fan of punctuation. The semi-colon is probably my favorite (followed closely by the parentheses), although you wouldn't know it from the comments I (sporadically, admittedly; my bad) leave on your blogs.

From my comments, there is one clear punctuation prizewinner.


(wait for it)


The exclamation mark!!! Wohooo!! Hells yeah!

Partly this is due to the fact that I am always! so! excited! to finally be catching up on blog reading; however, I suspect my excessive exclamations are mostly due to two other factors:

1. I do a lot of blog reading on Saturday late mornings/early afternoons, after I've had four cups (according to my Mr. Coffee, but really it's just two cups in the world of Actual Coffee Drinkers).

2. I do the rest of my blog reading late at night, so I must! over! compensate! Not that I do this consciously, of course.


What is your favorite?

Linkage: You will thank me

Okay, so Professor Anonymous wrote a superfab (yeah, a said it) post the other day about summer classes with....wait for it.... lyrics about summer teaching set to "Summer Nights" from Grease.

Feel free to swoon onto your lab bench at any time.


While you are there, be sure to check out the list of key terms in the header. Excellent summer reading.

I am living proof that...

...if your students make a wish on the very first crystal that appears in their test tubes, their wish will come true.

Apparently they were all wishing that I would come down with food poisoning* and be unable to finish their finals.



Of course, they underestimate my multitasking abilities: barf, write, blog, barf, calculate....






*Funny but true: of all the crap I ate today-- chocolate cake, chips, chocolates...I'm pretty sure it was a salad that did me in. I guess I should have stuck to sugar??

A conversation with N.A.

N.A. and I talk each night, either by cell or video iChat (and sometimes both...although not at the same time). I was just about to go to bed, when N.A. called.

He sounded frantic. Before he could get to the point, several worst-case scenarios went through my head:

1. A parent, sibling or pet was sick.

2. Students were protesting their recent grades by camping out on his lawn.

3. The election was included in some sort of government buyout plan, and Palin had been appointed Queen of the World!


Imagine my relief when he finally spilled it: "You wrote something bad on your blog! Go open it up!"

Intrigued, I fired up my laptop. I assumed I had mistyped a pseudonym, either revealing his name or my place of work. I scanned my most recent entries but found nothing amiss.

N.A.: Look at the top! In your tagline!

Me: I don't see anything wrong, NA.

N.A.: Your job? "Navigating a Visiting ass position"...?

Me: Um...yeah, I meant for it to say "ass".

N.A.: Oh. You did??? Why? It gives an image of-- of---

Me: Butt sex? It's an abbreviation for "assistant professor." It also pretty well sums up what most of the LargeU faculty thought I was doing: being a dumbass for taking a visiting position at a SLAC rather than a high-profile research postdoc position. You know, it's tongue in cheek.



N.A. paused. I thought he had accepted my answer. Then he very quietly said, "Please don't say tongue-in-cheek when we're talking about butts."